Never Neverland

Thursday, May 23, 2013

It occurred to me last night as Chris and I were dancing like two idiots at the
Of Monsters and Men concert that him and I are really becoming more like the Lost Boys every day.
The Lost Boys of Never Neverland, that is.
I think we are literally refusing to grow up.

We don't seem to be doing the "normal things" most people our age should be doing.
i.e. getting married, buying a house, saving for the future...
We just keep having way too much fun enjoying everything Chicago has to offer.
We went from acting like we were 40 year olds just three years ago living in a small town,
with stable jobs, doing responsible things adults should do...
To living in Chicago chasing our dreams and staying out too late.

(For all of you Of Monsters and Men fans, it was a great concert!)

But I've basically realized living in a city encourages the Neverland syndrome, there seems to be a lot of people here that don't want to grow up.
Just go to a bar at any time of the day and you will find them.
That is one thing about Chicago that never ceases to amaze me, whenever you walk into a bar or restaurant on any given day of the week you will not be alone.
Sunday afternoon, Monday night, Wednesday morning, it doesn't matter.
People are always out and about, ready to have a good time.

The only thing that occasionally interrupts my joy of living in Never Neverland is social media.
I often wonder how people felt bad about their lives pre Facebook & Instagram.
I mean don't you think it would have bothered Peter if he could have kept tabs on Wendy via Twitter?
A "just got a huge raise at work #blessed!" tweet would have annoyed him for sure considering he can't even afford to eat real food most of the time...
Rufio! Rufio! Rufio!
Or at the very least it would have pissed of Tink, she was always a jealous little fairy.

I guess May must be a let's get engaged/married/pregnant/buyahouse kinda month.
It's fine. I get it.
I was telling Chris about one of the girl's I like to stalk on social media,
 (only in a nice way because I'm a little envious of her life and can admit that)
and described her to him as, "you know that one girl who I'm obsessed with because she lives in that great house with her cute husband who buys her whatever she wants."
And I am just now realizing how pathetic that sounds having typed it all out... anyway though...
Chris responded, "Tay, that was going to be our life if we hadn't move to Chicago."
That's Chris for ya, always the logical one. But he's right.
Had we stayed in Kansas we'd both have our cushy jobs (his was cushy, mine was corny)
we'd probably own a nice house, with a garage to boot,  and maybe we'd even be (GASP) married.

But instead we chose Never Neverland.
And even though I sometimes longingly look at other people's lives with their big homes,
and their big backyards, I wouldn't trade what we have for a minute.
Well maybe a minute, just to remember what it's like to have a garage that goes right into the house...
But no more than a minute.

Sure the grass may always look greener on the other side,
but this is Chicago, nobody has grass.



  1. I don't think there's anything wrong with never wanting to grow up. I'm getting closer and closer to graduating nursing school and all I can think is "But, I want to travel! And play with my dog! and eat all the ice cream I want!" not work in a hospital and actually be responsible for people's lives. It's pretty scary.

  2. Yo friend, I kind of love this post a lot. Resonates with me quite a bit and that's that shit I do like.

  3. Well guess what... you envy her life BUT I envy yours ;) I love my life don't get me wrong... I live in Kentucky on a farm with a house that has a garage. I am married to the love of my life, we have three girls, and a #SWAGGERWAGON! Holla But oh what it would be like to be free... not married, no kids, living in Chicago, and dancing around like nobody is watching!

  4. did you watch hook over the weekend too?! it was on multiple times.... i totally support neverland. everyone is off getting married and being productive and buying homes and shit and i am over here just like give me a puppy. i want to play with it.

  5. I love this post! And I love to see all the great spots you it up in Chicago. My cousin lives there now and I am mentally planning our trip based on your posts (not creepy at all!)

  6. I bet you one trillion dollars she is jealous of your life too. and your life sounds pretty great. I am married and live in a (TINY) house but I still feel like a kid. i have no desire for kids or anything grown up. and im ok with that.

  7. I love this post. And I'm here to tell you (as a 40ish year old) that I'm the same way. Yeah, I'm married, but we don't have kids and we live in the city (not as big as Chicago, but still...) and we act more like kids now than we did when we lived in the suburbs. We just may never grow up!

  8. And do you know how much it costs to keep the grass looking halfway decent? (By halfway decent I mean weeds abound but everything is still green-ish) We have a yard, but it's our landlords' responsibility not ours, and our apartment is small... But we're cozy, happy, and have no kids (and none soon) so who the hell cares?!? Never, neverland only lasts for so long anyway... Then you suddenly realize you're growing up and that time is just a memory. Dance away girl, dance away!

  9. Don't have much else to say but wow girl, you two are some smart cookies! You might be living in Neverland but you have your shit together in Neverland!

  10. live your life and enjoy every minute of it! There are no rules stating you should be married and have a house and a baby by a certain time. As long as you are having fun and enjoying life that is all that matters!

  11. Living in Chicago (or I guess any city, really) IS like living in Neverland (the Peter Pan Neverland, not the Michael Jackson Neverland...)! It's so true, only social media really makes me feel like I should be even more of an adult than I already am. Crazy suburbanites and their guilt-inducing house/baby pictures...

  12. I love just love this post! At 22 and a recent college grad, I often wonder if I should remain comfortable where I'm at or if I should bite the bullet and chase my dreams, wherever that may be. Thanks for showing me that it's ok to chase your dream, no matter how far away it is :)

  13. I love your closing line, nobody has grass in Chicago. It's perfect, so clever and funny. I wonder that sometimes too, I guess you could only envy your neighbors from your house and people you've visited or heard about... I really think social media does more harm than good.

  14. Girl, I'm right in the middle. Married and saving to build a house but we are still in Never Never Land when it comes to all other aspects of growing up (ex: kids...) Hell, we are headed to New Orleans on Saturday and just got back from the beach. And you know what, I'm quite alright with that! Life is fun. What's the hurry, I say?

  15. My Peter Pan syndrome is pretty insane. I do live in a big city and still keep up with my old waiter friends who are still in school. I have a job M-F so I need to be in bed early. I'm totally jealous and don't want to grow older. But, I think to myself that a lot of young people didn't get the privilege of getting to the age I am now so I am still grateful :D

  16. And there are people on the other side of it, with a husband (who doesn't buy her everything she wants, bummer), kids, garage, who sometimes, just for a moment, think that the neverland life sounds pretty damn good. I don't think there's anything wrong with knowing how good we have it, but thinking about the what ifs.
    I love reading about your adventures and while mine aren't as grand, I try to add a little sprinkle of spontaneity and adventure into my life. What's the fun of life if you don't, really?

  17. Hi. I love this post. I also live in Chicago with my boyfriend and, although I didn't realize it until I read this, have chosen Never Neverland instead of a cushy life in the small Midwest town where I'm from. Thank you for this. It helped put some things into perspective for me. Also, you're hilarious so thanks for being you.

  18. Did you know all the professional drinkers go out on Monday nights 'cause that is when all of the best drink deals are? Oh and lucky you for getting to go see Of Monsters and Men in concert!

  19. Good post. I really want to say that I love that second picture so much.

  20. We have a house, but not a big house. We will never have a big house as long as we live here. My husband has a good job while chances I never will. Pre FB was ignorance which was basically bliss. I lust after other peoples lives that I would have never known about were it not for social media too. We make choices because apparently we can't have it all. Which kinda sucks sometimes but that's life.

  21. great post! Thanks for sharing. and yes that is honestly sometimes why I avoid fb and twitter is because I don't want to see what everyone else is up to while I am not being productive with my time. Sometimes you need a few weeks or a few days to just relax and enjoy life

  22. I love the Peter Pan quotes! Honestly, I bet that those same people that you envy also envy you :)

  23. I liked this post.

    Isn't that where Michael Jackson lived? LOL

    There are always trade-offs in life and you can never "really" tell what would have happened in the past. You only have memories of what it was at the time, not what it might have turned into.

    My husband and I joke about that all the time since I met him in France while studying and partying my face off. We go down the path, what if we'd stayed in France as we originally planned...etc. I had to come home due to a family emergency and then my husband (at the time boyfriend) followed me back to Canada soon afterwards. Some 23 years later here we are still together. Who knew? Not me that's for damn sure.

    I've come to learn that where I am right now is where I'm meant to be. Every decision I ever made in my life brought me to this point. Although it's fun to reminisce the only real smart thing is to look forward towards the future and try not to pay too much attention to what others are doing around you. We all know that FB is basically brag book and that 95% of the crap on there isn't even true. It is like the personal dating site of "real life" and a work resume where everything has been exaggerated. Everyone is embellishing and padding to make their lives look better.

  24. Oh my goodness..,, I can totally relate! I love this!!!

  25. Oh my goodness..,, I can totally relate! I love this!!!

  26. I think about this all the time... not because I have friends doing it but because I think how nice it would be to feel settled and loved. But then I remember that the fun I'm having in NYC isn't something I can do later, while settling down is. And let's be real... I can barely remember to feed and water myself - which means starting a family and/or a garden probably isn't something i'd be that great at right now anyways.

  27. love this post. it absolutely speaks to how i feel! how lucky that you get to live out your dream!
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  28. If you were more "settled" then you would long for days of fun. Don't get me wrong, I love my life. We live in a VERY small community, have 3 amazing children, Hubby has a nice job and we have most of what we want BUT there are days that I long to just have a week out with the Hubby living it up!

  29. Growing old is inevitable, growing up is not. Words I live by. MArried a man 6 years younger than me to keep that youthful spirit alive in my life.

  30. Awesome post! I think you are amazing! And just remember, all of those mid-western housewives talk about that cute blonde girl, living her dream in Chi-town, without a care in the world....

  31. Good lord, I can relate. While married, the other big things I am still waiting for. We have been house hunting for MONTHS with no luck. And all I see on FB day after day is all of my friends buying their beautiful dream homes, or better yet, building them! How on gods green earth can they afford that shit?!? I can afford a trailer in a dumpy ass trailer park right now. Welcome to my life.

  32. First time commenter here and I must say I totally relate to this post. I am married and have a house but my husband and I are the only couple out of our friends that have made the pilgrimage to the suburbs. We are one of very few couples that haven't jumped on the baby train. We have no intention of doing either of those things anytime soon. We love living in a city, having way too many beers while watching the baseball game on a Sunday, going to happy hour any day of the week, laying around all day without having to worry about anyone else but each other. Kids and the suburbs can wait! Great post!

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