A Bloody Mary Recipe

Sunday, March 30, 2014

Some people say the trick to creating a perfect Bloody Mary rests in the type of vodka you use. Well those people clearly have more money than I do. Because even though I'd like to, I can't exactly afford to use Grey Goose whenever I please. Sometimes a girl's only choice is the $10.99 Country Club vodka at Walgreens. So I say the trick to creating a perfect Bloody Mary is all in the garnish. The more the merrier. 

Garnishes I've Had:
Pickled Asparagus
Pickled Egg (Only had this once Wisconsin.)
Slice of cold pizza (Served this way at Home Slice.)

Yes, I'm a aware I'm a fat kid. What can I say? I like to think of my Bloody Mary as an appetizer. 

What I actually put in the drink:
Zing Zang Bloody Mary Mix 
(I've made Bloody's from scratch before using tomato juice but I realized that's just silly when there's so many amazing mixes available. And because I'm lazy.)
Horse Radish
Lime Juice
Olive Juice
Celery Salt
Shot of beer

I don't measure anything. It's all to taste. And sometimes I'm more ambitious than others with using all of these ingredients. It usually depends on the hangover. But there you have it, that's just a few things that I like to add to make the "perfect Bloody Mary."

And now to switch gears entirely, I was lucky enough to be a part of an awesome group of girls who have teamed up to offer one lucky winner $250 to Graphic Image. This store has quickly become my go-to for amazing leather accessories. I own a monogramed bag tag and a beautiful blue clutch. I was hoping to show a photo of my clutch today but my sweet nephew Knox hid the purse from me over the weekend while I was in Nebraska so it's being shipped to me... More stories on that trip tomorrow... 

Anyway, do yourself a favor and enter this giveaway!


Graphic Image is giving away $250 to spend on their website!  Graphic Image makes some of the cutest leather products such as calendars, planners, journals, iPad cases and iPhone cases.  They also just released their amazing selection of spring colors that I'm sure you will be drooling over!  To enter to win, complete the entries using the Rafflecopter widget below.  The more entries you complete, the more chances you will have to win the $250 gift card!  The giveaway will be open to all U.S. residents through March 7 at 12:00am CST.  Good luck and thanks for entering! 

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Implant Surgery Part II

Friday, March 28, 2014

Guys, it's been a helluva day already and it's not even 10:00 a.m. So I have to keep this real short and simple at the moment.

Yesterday I had my first follow-up appointment after that implant surgery I had back in November. (Dental implant, remember? We all know I'm not that fun.) When the doctor told me to put safety goggles on I knew shit was about to get bad. And I was right. I was poked and prodded and drilled for almost two hours. At one point they were actually screwing a tiny little rod into my gums with a tiny little tool that I don't think should ever be allowed near a mouth. And I still have one more follow-up appointment to go in three weeks.... The dentist is literally going to be the death of me.

Today my mouth is sore as hell, I've got an unusually heavy work load to tackle, and I just can't seem to get my head on straight at the moment. So on that note, I'm out. I hope you have a wonderful weekend! April is literally knocking at the door.

*Turning comments off today simply because I'm annoyed with myself for not having been super great at responding this week. 

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10 Ways Blank Check Changed My Life

Thursday, March 27, 2014

The acting world lost another good one this week. I'm sad to report the dad from Blank Check, James Rebhorn, passed away a few days ago. Or more recently, crazy Carrie Mathison's dad on Homeland. However you know him, he was a great actor.

Today's post is dedicated to Rebhorn. Thus I present to you, 10 Ways Blank Check Changed My Life.

1. Thanks to this movie, I will forever be obsessed with the idea of having a water slide connected from my bedroom to an outdoor pool.

2. "Macintosh" became my go-to last name when playing Barbies, dolls, or writing short stories as a kid. Everybody's last name was always Macintosh. Occasionally I would switch it up and use "McKinley."

3. I still want a pink convertible pool raft.

4. I wanted a fat old man who drives a limo as a best friend.

5. I will always aspire to live in a castle house.

6. For the first time in my life I wanted to cut my hair short, dye it dark, and go by the name "Shay."

7. Inflatable sumo wrestling suits will always be entertaining for me. Always.

8. Preston's eye wear. Seriously, how cute is he?

9. I suddenly wanted to become a thief. Let's just say unattended check books weren't safe around me for a few years.

10. This movie reminded me nothing is impossible.

*After further research this post is also dedicated to Preston. Apparently life wasn't all roses after this movie after all.

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21 Everyday Struggles Of Being A Blogger

Wednesday, March 26, 2014

Trying to figure out if it's best to post in the morning, afternoon, or night....

Worrying about who is going to take your next outfit photo.

And when taking that outfit photo, worrying about who is watching the public photo shoot that is suddenly going on in the street now.

When you write a post and no one comments... (see years 2009-20012 of my archives.)


Wondering why your favorite blogger suddenly locked down their block. Or did they just lock you out?

Dreaming of the day all Picmonkey.com fonts are free. Or the day you decide to buck up and pay $3.99/month.

Hoping Blogher chooses you for that awesome campaign you really want to do... But oh shit, they didn't choose you yet again.

Wishing you had a prettier home office. Or just a home office at all...

Wondering why some bloggers still have GFC on their blog.

And if you're a GFC'r, wondering why you're still refusing to let you go of yours. cough cough.

When you have nothing to write about and you just stare at your computer screen for hours hoping something will magically appear.

Cursing yourself for not taking a single photo over the weekend.

When five people immediately unfollow you on Instagram because you've posted yet another photo of Grandma Harlow...

Wondering how you're going to sneak in another sponsor post without having your readers get too annoyed with you.

When Bloglovin just decides not to publish one of your posts to their site for a day. And again the next week. And again the next...

Debating if you should switch to WordPress. Or if you did switch, debating if you should switch back.

When Twitter decides to go crazy and doesn't link to your site, even though you specifically asked it to.

When your go-to blogger suddenly goes on hiatus for a few weeks and your mind starts wondering about the worst possible situations that must have happened to them.

Too many hashtags.

Not enough hashtags.

Like I always say guys, it's a blog eat blog world out there. Stay strong. The struggle is real.

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Doubt Kills Dreams.

Tuesday, March 25, 2014

I think if my parents would have taken me to the doctor more than once every five years as a kid they might have found out I have anxiety. I've never had an actual panic attack (I don't think?) I've never been diagnosed per say, but I've finally realized after so many years of life that when I say "I have the feeling like a tornado is coming" that might be classified as anxiety.

And that's how you know I'm from Nebraska, because I mean that phrase very literally. Having grown up in tornado alley, I have always been terrified of them. Each time I would watch the news and see that Madison County was in a "watch" my stomach would drop and my hands would clam up. I would sit out the rest of the night in pure agony awaiting my fate. And if the "watch" should be moved up to a "warning" by the National Weather Service I would grab my loved ones close by (which were my Beanie Babies and Polly Pockets) and haul ass to the basement to start praying. Our Fathers, Hail Marys, I said them all over and over and over.

And that my friends, is only the behavior of a high strung little kid who probably suffers from anxiety. Or as my parents liked to call me, "a very focused little kid." One in the same, obviously.

*Just to give you an awesome visual this is the exact suitcase I used to keep my most prized processions in. And yes, I was born in 1971.

Fast forward a few years and I still find myself saying from time to time "I just have that feeling like a tornado is coming" and I realized two things. A. I should stop saying it like that because it sounds very hick. And B. it's probably anxiety. Or C. if it's during the months April-June and it's eerily still and green outside it could be both. And in that case GET TO THE BASEMENT!

Lately that tornado has been hanging over my head almost every single day and it comes in the form of the little voice that whispers, "Why aren't you where you want to be yet? Why haven't you done what you want to do yet? Why didn't you start sooner? Time is running out. Hurry hurry hurry." I've lived my entire life in a rush. The last thing I need is a tornado telling me to hurry it up.

It's exhausting. But the fact of the matter is that I want to do a lot of things. And it seems like every morning I'm reminded that I'm not doing those things yet. Sometimes it feels like I'm on the right track, but other times I'll look at my myself and wonder what in the hell I'm doing. Why do I even bother with stand-up because who knows where it will end up? Why do I spend ten hours a week at iO and Second City because sometimes I end up leaving those buildings feeling more lost than I did before? Why did I spend six months writing a book that now just sits on my computer because I'm scared too finish it?

And why am I having daily soul searching conversations with my dog?

But questions like these kill. Because they're rooted in doubt. There will always be the possibility of a tornado lingering in the horizon, but I suppose that's what keeps me on my toes. So I guess my only option is to keep my loved ones close by and pray for the best outcome.

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A Chicago Foodie Weekend

Monday, March 24, 2014

Somehow this past weekend ended up being far more busy than I expected. Let me break it down for you.

Saturday morning I filmed a fun little video with some improv pals for Scriptless Films. I played "Lydia Johansson," the small town Kansas girl who just moved to the city to chase her dreams after her cult leader died a few weeks ago... If you think I look nice in this photo, you should see the actual video.... I be looking real rough.

To celebrate a successful day of looking like an idiot I met Chris at our fav spot, Barn & Company for some bball and bloodys.

And some pulled pork nachos...

And when we were walking home I spotted some girl scouts selling cookies on the corner and you better believe I ran right over to them and purchased a few boxes. Is it just me, or did Samoas change their name to "Carmel Delights" for a few years? Am I losing my mind here? Or did some girl scouts just rip me off and sell me a box of cookies from five years ago?

The little red head with the mic does kind of look like she belongs in the 90s. Regardless, they were good. Chris and I finished the box in less than twenty-four hours.

For dinner we met Chris's mom and sister at Ditka's downtown and munched on some bruschetta and a tuna plate.

I know I should take better food photos, but I always feel like such an asshole snapping pics of my food as it is that I try to do it as fast as possible without anyone seeing... Thus the reason they're always a bit grainy or too bright. My apologies. 

After Ditka's we met some friends at The Drawing Room and sipped on drinks that were way too expensive and took way too long to make. I just can't wrap my head around fancy bars. I'm way more of a hole-in-the-wall kinda gal. 

It was kind of funny, as the four of us sat in this uppity bar in downtown Chicago we all couldn't help but talk longingly about our bars back in Nebraska we hold so near and dear to our hearts. I'm talking about you, The Rail, and you, The Bar. We'll meet again soon... 

 Anyway, Sunday night I had a show at The Second City. Here I am looking pissed off.

I don't know what my deal is, for some reason I just can't let go on stage with improv as of late. I get all in my head and start second guessing everything, which is like the worst mistake you can make with improv. You just have to forget everything else and play. It should be simple, right? I need to bring the fun back and stop criticizing every single thing I do in my head. It's a real buzz kill. 

Following my mediocre performance we went with Chris's family to Eataly (I told you it's my favorite thing to do now) and ate even more good food. It was kind of an intense foodie weekend, as you can tell.

And we immediately came home and went into food coma mode. Harlow included.

And that's all I've got. I'm not ready to tackle Monday at all at the moment. Woof.

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Reading Outloud My Negative Comments

Friday, March 21, 2014

Two weeks ago I wrote a post called Inside a Woman's Mind at Target.

I typed it up, hit publish, and then didn't think much about it and went on with my regular Friday routine. Within a few hours I noticed it was starting to attract a bit more traffic than others. That's neat, I thought, and once again continued on with my day.

Four days later I decided to submit it to Thought Catalog, an online magazine, because they've published some of my stuff in the past and I thought it seemed like an article they might like. Less than twenty four hours after Thought Catalog picked it up things started to get a bit... weird. It began with a few texts from friends and family telling me that my post was randomly showing up on their Facebook and Twitter feed. And then a few emails came in and a few more texts. And again I thought, oh that's neat. And I also thought a little bit of oh shit. 

I was curious to see how many times it had been shared so I decided to check for myself.  According to Thought Catalog it was shared over 170,000 times in the first few days. And then I really thought oh shit.

Let's be honest here, we all know what happens when a post starts to garner a bit of traffic: the comments start to come. Lots and lots of comments from strangers all across the country. Some are funny. And some are really funny. I've chosen some of my favorites to read in the video below.

Happy Friday, internet world. Go take on the day.

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Blog Land Is Weird

Thursday, March 20, 2014

I couldn't help myself. Blog Land needed its own infographic I thought. 

I really do love you, blog land. I'd be lost without you. Thanks for always putting up with my sense of humor.


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What My Style Says About Me

Does anyone else ever get kind of confused with their own style? Sometimes I find myself wanting to dress all hip like the cool kids in Wicker Park in their oversized garage sale clothes with weird high skinny pants, but then the next minute I'll walk into J Crew and want every grandma cardigan and blazer I can find. Half of my closet looks like it belongs to a grungy teenager and the other half looks like it belongs to an old lady who plays bridge at the Country Club. Which I guess is kind of spot on. That's me to a T.

Really what it all boils down to is that I usually just want to wear what is comfortable. I did the uncomfortable tight clothing thing in college and no thank you. Never again will I wear stupid sleeveless dresses in the winter because I think it looks good. What an idiot.

Naturally when I got the chance to partner with one of my favorite online stores, Zappos, and choose a few items from their contemporary fashion line I went right to the big sweaters. This French Connection sweater was just calling my name.

And it did not disappoint, it's just as comfortable as it looks.

And I'm a really big fan of loafers right now. (It's the grandma side.) These are by Penny Loves Kenny and they are perfect for a gal who suffers from FAFS like myself- Fat Ass Feet Syndrome. My feet are basically as wide as they are long and sometime that makes for hard shoe shopping. If you're like me, do yourself a favor and order these shoes, but order them a half size bigger than what you normally wear.

And this is my "ooh are you taking my picture?" because I'm trying to look coy look. I'm rocking the same pants, same shoes, but now with my other go to fashion staple- a little bit of denim. Denim vests, denim shirts, denim jackets, I love it all. I think it's the Midwestern in me that just can't stray from a good Canadian tuxedo.

I've owned a lot of denim vests in my time (I'm from Nebraska, so it's like a law) but this vest by Vince Camuto is by far my favorite.

And there you have it. That's a little bit of my style at the moment. But who knows, it will probably change tomorrow. What's your style like?

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I Can't Wait For Summer Because...

Wednesday, March 19, 2014

Do you know what all of these photos have in common? They're from a magical time known as summer. And more so than ever, I can't wait for it to return.

I can't wait for summer because...

I need sunlight and warm air in my life again.

I need lake time and pool time and any other time that involves laying by water with a drink in hand.

Because I want to go to the farmers market and buy fresh produce- or at the very least browse the farmers market and then go to Trader Joe's to buy fresh produce because why not it's cheaper there...

I need the trees to turn green and the flowers to bloom. My street looks as depressed as I feel right now.

I want to go on long walks with Harlow that I actually enjoy. And when I say "long walks" I really mean our daily trips to Dairy Queen. 

I want beer gardens back in my life. And brunching outside on a Sunday morning.

I want to wake up in the morning and know that when I step out my door the air will be warm and welcoming rather than frigid and hateful. 

I want to wear shorts and sandals and dresses and all of those wonderful summer clothes that seem too good to be true right now. 

I want long summer nights spent outside on the patio with a glass of wine and good music.

Because I want to go to outdoor concerts and street festivals and pretend I'm a hipster in my high waisted jean shorts and crop tops. 

Can we all just agree that life is better in the summer? 

People are happier. Pets are happier. Mother Nature is happier.

Summer, let's hurry it up already.

Link up with Helene and I and share why you can't wait for summer!

The Daily Tay

PS- Helene and I decided that in honor of our excitement for summer we'd throw in a fun giveaway for $50 to Pottery Barn. Go buy yourself some summer decor for your house!

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Missed Connections- Chipotle Guy Who Gave Me Extra Barbacoa

Tuesday, March 18, 2014

One month ago I walked into Chipotle over lunch and there you were. You were exotic looking, in a Southern Illinois type of way, with your long black hair tied back in a rubber band and a twinkle in a your eye. You said, "Welcome to Chipotle, what can I get you?" And I knew you were special, I just didn't realize how special yet.

I told you I wanted a salad because I've tricked myself into believing I'm eating healthy at Chipotle if that's what I get, as opposed to a burrito that weighs about the same as a newborn. And because their meat is all like farm grown or whatever I feel like I'm doing good for the earth. I like to think I'm doing Nebraska a favor.

You started filling my white little container with lettuce and then black beans (I always want pinto but I feel like black beans are healthier) and then with your kind eyes you asked "what kind of meat?" And I looked down to the floor because I typically hate this part. It usually just leads to disappointment. "Barbacoa" I mumbled.

And then it happened. As if you were the patron saint of meat at Chipotle you started layering my meager bed of lettuce and beans with more barbacoa than my little heart could desire. I looked up as if to say what is happening right now? But you just continued on like it was nothing. Because that's the type of guy you are, Chipotle Guy. The type who gives extra meat just because he can. You're getting harder and harder to come by these days.

I didn't know it at the time, but I would never see you again after that one magical day.

Now when I go into Chipotle I can barely contain my rage with the lack of meat I am given. Nobody wants to be the bitchy person who whines, "um excuse me, but can I have more meat? You gave the guy in front of me at least half a spoon more." I know better, I just shouldn't watch the guy in front of me because it's pathetic. But is it? IS IT? Are we rationing meat now, Chipotle? I can only assume the amount of barbacoa that is given out per day is taken directly out of your employee's paychecks because they hoard it. The meat is their power and boy do they hold it over us.

But now I've gone and got myself all upset again and that wasn't my intention. Like Emily Maynard would say in my heart of hearts I really do love Chipotle. I suppose I could just pay the extra $2.00 for additional meat. But that's my guac money. I know it might seem like it when I come in there buying chips and a drink sometimes, but I'm not a millionaire, Chipotle Guy. I'm just a regular girl who wants her fair portion of meat is all.

I sometimes almost wish that one day would have never happened. It's like that book I read in middle school, Flowers for Algernon. Maybe ignorance really is bliss.

I'll keep coming back to Chipotle hoping one day I'll find you again. How can I not? If we lose hope what else is left in the world?

Call me,
-Crazy Eyes

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