Thoughts On The Oscars
Monday, February 29, 2016
The weather has been unseasonably warm in Chicago and it has everyone feeling like Harlow looks. Ears down, eyes slanted, smile spread as far as it can go. We're all hoping for an early spring and I think we might get our wish. Last year winter lasted until May, but I think Chicago's taking it easy on us this year.
Harlow and I ran to the beach yesterday and played for a solid hour. It just felt so good to get out of the house and not have the air hurt. It felt too good to be true. Which made me wonder what people who live in warm climates have to complain about? WHAT? Life is so much easier when it's sunny.
After spending as much time outside as possible until it started to rain I settled on the couch to watch eight hours of the Oscars.
I've watched the Academy Awards since I was little. I've never missed. When I was a kid I used to imagine myself there and I'd practice the speech I'd give after I'd just won. I would get so jealous when I saw other little kids there and was determined to be there one day.
As an adult, I still do the exact same thing. I have my award winning speech ready to give (it's super good and inspirational, you'll probably get choked up when you hear it) and I still get jealous of the little kids who get to be there.
In the most recent years when I've watched the Oscars a dark cloud of regret and failure has always hovered close by. I almost couldn't watch anymore because the show was no longer about hopes and dreams for me but instead it was a huge reminder of how little I've accomplished. It just made me feel like a big old loser who will never get where I really to want to be. I'd watch it and feel cynical and angry about everyone else there who was so much more talented than me.
Woof. What a Debbie Downer.
But yesterday was different for some reason. I was excited as I watched. I imagined myself there again someday. Which sure, you can call silly because I most definitely still dream like I did when I was a kid and have very unrealistic expectations in life. But whatever! Keeping my head in the clouds gives me energy. It keeps me working. It makes me write another day on a story that I know no one may ever read.
But then again, who knows?
Every movie mentioned last night simply started as an idea in a dreamer's head somewhere.
See what the nice weather does to me? It makes me think whimsy happy thoughts. No wonder so many creatives live in LA.
Did you watch last night? What did you think?