Pilates Confessions and Latte Obsessions - My First Fan Fiction

Friday, April 22, 2016

Mixing it up today since it's Friday and trying my hand at some fan fiction! I hope you love it. And if you don't, that's okay too. It's just one day. And it was a real treat for me to play around with this! Also, here's a photo of me pretending to work out. Hope you love this too.

*names have been changed to protect the identities of the wealthy Lincoln Park women whom I occasionally watch at Starbucks, Pilates, ext as I day dream about what their lives must be like. 

Cynthia felt slightly bloated as she walked into pilates class. She knew she shouldn't have gotten a grande latte, but it was Friday morning and she was feeling crazy! Like she could do anything. Maybe she'd skip her normal white mani and get red instead. Now that would really get people talking! The shear thought of doing something so wild sent chills down her back. Or perhaps that was the air conditioner she just walked by?

It was a chilly morning and the lulu tank top with 374 straps but no actual body fabric she picked out to wear today wasn't keeping her as warm as she hoped.

"Oh Cynthia! Love that top! It's so you," said Carol when she walked inside the studio.

"Thanks Sheryl, you can have it after class," Cynthia didn't like to wear a workout top more than once. It just didn't feel right.

"It's Carol, isn't it?" Asked the front desk girl.

"It's Sheryl now," Sheryl, previously Carol, snapped back at front desk girl. "Why is this servant girl even talking, am I right?" Sheryl laughed nervously when Cynthia didn't respond. "I'm kidding, she's amazing."

Cynthia glided into the pilates room and Sheryl followed closely behind, memorizing the mole patterns on Cynthia's back so she could think about it later.

They sat down on their reformer boards and began their stretching.

After this I have to order groceries for next week, then call the pool man to get the pool ready for summer, then mani. Of course I'll do white, who was I kidding. Pick up the kids from Latin School. Look at my bank account. Cynthia's mind was always creating a to-do list of some sort. It made her feel balanced and happy.

Cynthia. Cynnnnn-thea. Cyna. CynTHEA. Cynthia. Cynthia! Sheryl liked to repeat Cynthia's name in her head as they stretched next to each other. It made her feel balanced and happy.

They both looked toward the door just as another woman stumbled in. Her name was ... Tammy.

The first time Tammy walked into class Cynthia was certain she was a lost homeless girl. She was pretty sure she'd seen her shopping for food at CVS before, as if CVS is an okay place to buy food. It was so sad.

Tammy's lulu pants were old and tattered, bless her heart she must have stolen them from a dumpster. And then chewed on the ends for several hours and rolled in a pile of dirt and dog hair, Cynthia thought.

One time after class when Cynthia was climbing into her black Range Rover, saying good-bye to all of the other women from pilates climbing into their black Range Rovers, Cynthia saw Tammy ride away on some sort of skinny car that she had to pedal with her legs to make move. It didn't even have a steering wheel. Or a roof. It scared Cynthia too much so she had to look away.

After Tammy continued to show up to class and no one kicked her out or asked her to leave, Cynthia realized something different must be going on here. Either Tammy was a ghost and only Cynthia could see her. Or perhaps this was her make-a-wish? She did look awfully pale and ill most mornings. Her eyes were sunken in and she often smelled like toast.

Whatever it was, there was definitely something about Tammy that made Cynthia uneasy. She seemed like the type of freak who would write fan fiction. Or keep a blog. Sure, Carol was a little odd. But Tammy... Tammy was in her own category of weird.

Little did Cynthia know, their lives were about to intersect in ways she would never imagine.


You can learn more by following my snapstory today @thedailytay. You'll never guess what Sheryl did...

And that's that. I had to get it out of my system.  We're just having fun here! We'll return to normal blogging next week. Have a GREAT weekend!


  1. Well Shit.....now I've got to download snapchat! Hahaha! Loved this!

  2. Haha! That was awesome πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚

  3. Because I have randomly thought of and then chuckled at this post three separate times since reading it, I had to come back and comment! This is some good stuff right here and your humor is right up my alley…dyingπŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚! (And for real, go buy yourself a real carπŸ˜‚)

  4. I read this in your tone of voice and I was laughing the whole time! Write more!!!

  5. Please write a book. Please!!! I'd buy it on pre order even. But for real. Love this fan fiction!

  6. Lol, yes thank you! I love imaging these people. It reminds me of whenever I go to whole foods. Well, that's either rich people or hippies...But..I think Tammy is being a little too hard on herself ;) And you totally should write a book!! I wish I was good at fiction writing..but I cannot make up stories. For some reason I only like to write about myself and deep deep down the rabbit hole thoughts. But I wish!

  7. You were KILLING me on Snapchat with this! The banana was so freaking funny! I had to share this with my friend who doesn't read blogs at all and she was like, "I need to start reading this blog!" So you have a new fan.

  8. Reading this at work...just had to look away from the screen multiple times to regain my composure as I silently laughed in my office. Hoping none of my co-workers walk by because they will definitely wonder why i'm crying (from laughter).