Free The Nipple

Wednesday, June 15, 2016

Last Saturday Chris said he wanted to go watch The America's World Cup Sailboat Race happening at Navy Pier. I typically avoid Navy Pier at all costs, but he promised me brunch so I obliged.

I put on my best "I'm going to watch a sailboat race" outfit and then we jumped on the scooter to head downtown.


Is it easy to ride a scooter in a dress like this? No. No it is not. But I'm not one to think things through, so I wore it anyway and used my little sun hat to cover areas that needed to be covered, if you catch my drift.


Unfortunately the race didn't happen due to lack of wind, and I almost got into a verbal fight with a nasty woman at brunch who stole our table... brunch fights, am I right ladies? But it was a great morning never the less.

Anyway, a couple of hours later we're headed home, cruising down Michigan avenue and I'm looking around with a happy ass grin on my face thinking how much I love Chicago in the summer. Tourists are everywhere and Michigan ave is packed, as it always is on a summer weekend. I notice that a few people are staring at me, I assume it's because I look so damn cool on our blue Vespa.

Two really hip women cross the street in front of us and one of them gives me a thumbs up. Damn, I must look super hipster today, I think to myself. The lady had a half shaved head, so you know she is cool.

A couple more people hoot. Kids are even starting to point at me, presumably showing their parents how great I look.

I'm feeling unstoppable at this point. I clearly have it going on today. The wind is blowing in my hair, people are staring at how cool I am, what a day to be alive!

Then out of nowhere a college bro in a neon tank top yells, "TITTY!"

And I realize I'm not just feeling the breeze through my hair as we scoot down the busiest street in Chicago. I'm feeling it in my chestal area, as well. My left side to be specific.

The delicate little string, on the delicate little dress, had broken at some point and the left flap was free falling. And no, I was not wearing a bra. I was unintentionally freeing the nipple for God knows how long.

One block? Two? Three? I don't know.

Now I am all for women freeing the nipple if that's your prerogative. For me personally, it's not my prerogative. I am quite modest and am very okay keeping my nipples to myself. I was almost too modest to even share this photo, but my mom is sitting beside me as I write this and she says it's okay. *my mom is not modest.




So on that one summer day in 2016, (which happened to be the same day the World Naked Bike Ride rode through Chicago) I participated in my very own naked scooter ride.

And that's my story today. Have you ever freed your nip? Do tell!

28 comments:

  1. That's hilarious! It's happened to me once or twice while swimming that my bikini top has come down a bit, but nothing that compares to your story! :)

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  2. Omg Tay, I love this,it has made my day!
    I have had a nip slip while swimming in both my strapless and my very Victorias secretesque bikini, but never for more than a couple seconds.
    Also, kudos for going braless, that freaks me out, feels like the ladies are constantly standing to attention! Lol
    Www.simplysimone.me

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  3. Omg Tay, I love this,it has made my day!
    I have had a nip slip while swimming in both my strapless and my very Victorias secretesque bikini, but never for more than a couple seconds.
    Also, kudos for going braless, that freaks me out, feels like the ladies are constantly standing to attention! Lol
    Www.simplysimone.me

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  4. Once I was at the beach after (high) school with probably at least 20 classmates spread around, three of my friends right near me. All of a sudden the plastic clasp that held my swimsuit closed in the back snapped and my swimsuit flew open exposing everything. I grabbed it as fast as I could and I was mortified and no one said anything. I was like, "Did anyone see that?!" and not a single soul did. I was super lucky.

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  5. I'm sitting at my desk cracking up. That will be an amazing story for the rest of your life!! Haha! Also, your arms look damn good, lady! I bet Pilates-Carol is one jealous b*tch!

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  6. This is hilarious! Cute dress by the way and you totally rock it. This happened to me once. We were snorkeling in Aruba and my top must have come untied. People were waving and point at me under water so I was just waving back and pointing at the fish around me. Finally someone tapped me on my shoulder and point, I realized then that both girls were out. Beautifully Candid

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  8. Well aren't you the lucky one who can go braless.. If that would have happen to me I would be wearing a black eye after going over the first bump being slapped in the face by the boob. I envy you... I really really do.. ����

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  9. Oh my goodness you poor thing!! I would be traumatized if I knew my nip was just hanging loose! That dress though is farrrrr to adorable and you must fix the strap (with extra reinforcements) and wear it again!
    -Linds

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  10. I would be mortified. Way to make the best of the situation!

    Her Heartland Soul
    Herheartlandsoul.com

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  11. Oh dear!

    I accidentally freed the nipple once at the beach when I was about 16 and got knocked over by a wave and had to jump out of the water quickly to breathe. I jumped out of the water but the top of my swimsuit didn't get the memo. The only person who saw it was a 12-year-old boy and he sure wasn't going to complain!

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  12. Oh my goodness, I would have died. At least you have a funny story to tell though?
    xx, Maria
    From The South

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  13. Woops! At least you could fix it soon thereafter!

    xx Kelly
    Sparkles and Shoes

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  14. I was just on a Royal Caribbean cruise to Bermuda. Family vacation. 10 of us including kids. I was wearing a strapless bathing suit and carrying my 3 year old niece out of the pool. She pulled my right boob out and everyone on the pool deck saw. This happened the first day. So. YES. nothing like being known for voyeurism and being stuck with the same people for days. I almost jumped overboard.

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  15. Oh my! That is quite the tale to tell. Eeek!

    It's actually happened to me as well while we were on Spring Break in Florida this year. I was just laying on the beach, enjoying the rays while reading Harry Potter & the strap to my swimsuit broke. I most likely let, at least, the fella sitting behind me, a peek. :\

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  16. LOL!! Hysterical. For me, not you, of course.

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  17. Ohhhh my god, I would have died! I have thankfully never flashed my nipple in a public setting, but the world has seen my butt a time or two courtesy of wind and dresses not mixing well!

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  18. That is seriously hilarious, however I would have been completely mortified for quite some time if that had happened to me! Whoops!

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  19. Omg this is hilarious! Hope you can fix your dress as it's really cute :D Sophie x

    https://stylestarsandsparkle.blogspot.co.uk

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  20. I laughed so hard. So one day we were at our house with a huge group of friends. My boob slipped out of my swimsuit but I didn't know it. There were 5 guy friends giving my husband a hard time about sneaking up on my husband while my husband told me my boobs were out. The only person who saw was my husband, he got ambushed, and he was like, hey I got a show you all missed out on (because they were all focused on him.

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  21. Bahahaha this is great. When I was in high school I was dancing to "low" by lil jon no doubt at prom. I was pumping my arms and my chest in the most 16 year old white-girl fashion when my right boob popped right out of my strapless dress. It was freeing and terrifying.

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