I had a total Tom Hanks “Big” moment earlier today.
I was sitting in training,
someone in charge was rambling on about
“margins and expenses and spread sheets and cutting costs”
and I was munching on all the snacks that were given to us in goody bags.
I was busily singing along to “Wake me up, before you go go” in my head
(which is pretty typical)
when somewhere in between “take me dancing tonight”
and carving my pretzel into an anchor-
(a task harder than it sounds)
I was sitting in training,
someone in charge was rambling on about
“margins and expenses and spread sheets and cutting costs”
and I was munching on all the snacks that were given to us in goody bags.
I was busily singing along to “Wake me up, before you go go” in my head
(which is pretty typical)
when somewhere in between “take me dancing tonight”
and carving my pretzel into an anchor-
(a task harder than it sounds)
when I looked around the room and started to notice a few things.
First of all,
I was the only ten year old in the room who had
eaten my entire goody bag.
And I was definitely the only five year old in the room
who was turning my food into various objects.
Everyone seemed to be incredibly engaged in what boss-man talking about.
And then I realized how old everyone looked.
What was I doing in this room full of old people discussing spread sheets?
No way was I old enough to be here.
I knew I shouldn’t have played that damn Fortune Teller scratch ticket last week.
It really messed up my life.
The only difference between Tom Hanks (Josh Baskin) and myself
is that at the end of his work day he got to go home to a super sweet apartment
with a trampoline inside.
It doesn’t get much better than that.
Most of the time I still just feel like I’m elven years old.
I’m in fifth grade and my plans for when I grow up
still involve participating in the Olympics,
maybe the WNBA,
and possibly writing a few best selling novels that all involve ghosts of some sort.
(The Goosebumps series changed my life.)
Oh life.
Seriously though, this isn’t meant to be a deep dark post about how life is so dissapointing.
Not by any means, I’m quite happy with the way mine is folding out.
I’m think I’m just saying I still haven’t gotten over the fact I’m not,
and never will be,
Shannon Miller circa 1996.
1996 Olympics Gymnastic Team FOREVER!!!
And just to be clear I’m really liking my new job this far.
Let’s just say it’s going to be quite entertaining…
And this post is about as random as it gets.
OK, your posts flipping kill me! I'm sitting in a room with 9 other people trying to stifle my laugher. I found your blog last week through BeautifulMESS and love your writing!
I just started reading your blog and I love it! I am pretty sure that we are the same person. The 1996 Olympics Gymnastics team is and will always be the best team!!
Too funny! I think the same thing all the time when I go to conferences…. keep making fun objects out of your food, you need something to help you pass the time in those meetings 🙂
oh i love everything about this.
i was the only ten year old in the room. i am the youngest person where i work and totally feel that way too. lol.
goosebumps – i think i would still to this day sit down and read one of those books.
and yes i do love me some shannon, but man i was a sucker for dominique!!
oh yeah and MAYBE for the WNBA too. but we will keep that a secret. lol.
I can still vividly recall some of the images my mind created while reading Goosebumps. And I still get excited when I see the series sitting on a shelf in a kids bedroom (not that I find myself in a kids room often).
haha you are hilarious!!! We really don't have to grow up, do we? Your pretzel anchor is amazing by the way.
I feel that way all the time. I'm always listening to people in meetings bicker over something like font or how to cite something in minutes and I always wonder if they really care about that or what. Meanwhile I'm trying to figure out how to shop online without anyone seeing my screen.
That would be me at a meeting. I have definitely tried the pretzel anchor before. And if I ever have Skittles, forget about listening to whoever is speaking because I am busy arranging them into color-coordinated pyramids!
you crack me up! But I would have been right along your side snacking and not paying attention… heck I probably would have been passing notes!
haha too funny! Its so funny when you think back to being a kid and remember where you THOUGHT you'd be today. Surely at 25 I'd have like 4 kids or something… lol
You are the funniest 5 year old I know! I always nibble my pretzels into weird shapes, I like to bite the edges off all the way around it without breaking it. Growing up is lame, kids forever 😉 Thanks for the laugh. xoxo
Goosebumps. That shit was the heat. I see my students reading it today and it just takes me back. Also the series of small scary stories, you know what I'm talking about? There's three. Total life changers – I'm still afraid to be in the bathroom with the lights off.
PS. I'm a Dominque Moceanu fan myself. Shannon Miller was too old for the bunch.
haha… I do that with my pretzels too. I always try to bite the middle out without cracking the outside. It's pretty impossible
I feel ya girl. I feel like I'm regressing every day. Remember when we were little & all we wanted was to be older?! It's so the other way around now! Haha!
Goosebumps…yesssssss
haha!
I still tear up when I think about how Kerry Strug did that last vault on a bum ankle and nailed it. No other gymnastics team will bring it live the '96-ers did.
OMG i wished that I could be on a team with Dominique Dawes! She was my idol! LOL
hahaha yesssssssssss the 1996 olympics. how could any girl not be obsessed with that group of ladies? I used to refuse to answer to any name but Dominique (the little one. not dawes. not that I have anything against Dawes but Moceanu was more believable. for obvious reasons.) I was so normal.
Anyhow. I like you as a kid. Please stay that way.
The Zoltar!!!!!! And I cannot believe you don't have a trampoline inside your city apartment. I mean, I sure as hell do…
I've just decided to create a blog, which I have been wanting to do for a while. Thanks for this post, it's really useful!
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