It’s roughly 1:00 a.m., I’m leaving for Nebraska in about four hours and I am yet to sleep.
It’s because it’s Monday night (well now technically Tuesday morning) and I had my show at Second City a mere few hours ago. I’ve learned by now that I can’t ever sleep after a show, so most times I don’t even try. I’ve also figured out why so many comedians and performers drink so much every night, it’s because you have to if you want any chance of going to bed. It’s damn hard coming down off of that high.
Tonight was a good show. The crowd was into it. The tampon jokes were killing. The homo-erotic lines were spot on. It was just a great night that was over in the blink of an eye.
Whenever I get done with a good show I catch myself thinking how I wish I could do this every night. But of course everyone on that Second City stage tonight thinks that. That’s why we’re all there, after all. The shitty truth is that the percentage of us who will actually figure out a way to get paid to do comedy is slim to none. We’ve all picked a pretty hard industry to try to excel in, damn it.
Today SNL announced they hired a twenty year old comedian to their line-up and it sent my Facebook world into a shit storm. All of the comedians I’m virtual friends with seemed to have an opinion about this, most of them being negative. Why? Because as comedians we’re all just a bunch of insecure little assholes sometimes. And I mean that in the most lovingly way possible. Why else would we feel the need to get on a stage with a mic and beg people to laugh us? Like me!!! Like me!!!
So it only makes sense that when we see a twenty year old get hired to do something like SNL it’s a tough pill to swallow. Because it reminds all of us that we’re not getting hired by SNL.
But Pete Davidson (the guy they hired) is so damn good you just gotta swallow that pill anyway. If you like stand-up, you should google him and watch some of his videos. When you get discovered that young there’s a reason for it.
And when you’re still twenty-seven writing dear diary blog posts at 1:00 a.m. with a plate full of homemade nachos in your lap, there’s a reason for that as well… You’ve gotten a little bit off course. And you might also be kind of a loser. So stop eating your feelings and go write a book or something.
And this is why I shouldn’t write posts at 1:00 a.m. because it’s just turned into a ramble. Okay, thanks for listening. I’m going to sign off now and catch up on some baby reveal videos I’ve missed on Facebook this past week. What’s it going to be….. BOY or GIRL? The suspense makes me giddy every time.