Reasons I Know I’m A Crazy Dog Lady

Today is National Dog Day.

But if you ask me every day is National Dog Day. Isn’t that such a parent thing to say? When I was little I would complain to my mom there wasn’t a “Kids Day” like there was a Mother’s Day and she’d respond with a huff and an eye roll, every day is kids day.

And now I’ve become my mom.

In honor of this wonderful holiday today I’m going to get a little personal with all of you and let you know exactly how crazy/obsessed I am with my best friend, Harlow, by sharing a few of the bizarre things I do as a dog parent.

Don’t say I didn’t warn you, I’m a total weirdo…

When I leave the house I say good bye to Harlow at least 100 times. I repeatedly tell him “I’ll be right back!” and “I love you so much!” and “You’re just my little baby” over and over and over. It gets to the point where he’s just lying on the couch with this look in his eye that says, would you just leave already? I’m pretty sure there’s hamburger buns on the table I’d like to eat the second you walk out the door.


After I’ve finally completed the good bye ceremony and have indeed left the house, my mind will instantly go through every terrible situation that could happen.

-Did I leave a candle burning? No, never.


-But what if Harlow learns how to burn a candle? That could happen. Must put matches away.


-What if the TV falls on him because he gets excited and sees a squirrel outside and randomly runs into the TV? Must put TV away next time.


-Can he suffocate under the blanket? No. But maybe?


-What if someone tries to break in and realizes how awesome Harlow is and then kidnaps him? Must teach Harlow how to call 911.


And when I’m out, I will most definitely cut the night short because fewer things are more fun to me than sitting on the couch with Harlow on my legs… Is that terrible? Probably.

Chris and I plan vacations based on what we know Harlow will enjoy… remember that camping trip from earlier in the summer? All Harlow inspired. And did Harlow enjoy that trip you might ask? You tell me…

Yes, yes he did.

Also I regularly sing to Harlow, and make up new songs just about him. Chris does as well (he will probably be embarrassed I’m telling you this) but Chris has a great remix of the Christmas song, “Mary, Did You Know?” but instead is about, “Harlow, Did You Know?” Kills me every time.

What can I say? I really like my dog. He’s my best friend. He’s been with me from moves across the Midwest. To being my only pal when I was the new kid in a big city. And in those tough moments when I got laid off, didn’t make the cut for an audition, or just all around felt lousy. Har’s always there. I don’t get sappy about much in this life, but damn it I’ll get sappy about him.

But I’ll have save that for his bday post in two weeks…

Happy National Dog Day, friends. Spend time and really be with your pup, not just today but every day. And if you want to have some fun, go buy a bunch of clearance toys at a pet store and drop them by a shelter. Or just make a donation for animals.

And now I’m going to put on my dog shirt and have a good day with my bestie. I suggest you do the same.

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25 Comments

  1. August 26, 2015 / 11:10 am

    Ditto ditto to all of the above. I can't tell you how many times we've left events early so I could get back to my pup. I almost convinced my husband to cut our honeymoon short because I missed him so much! #crazydogmoms

  2. August 26, 2015 / 11:28 am

    This is toooo true. Our dog rules our life and to be honest I'm not upset about it, because she's the greatest.

  3. August 26, 2015 / 11:48 am

    Uh I totally make up songs for my dog Ollie. The most embarrasing was when my next door neighbor and friend walked in when I thought it was just my husband and me in the house. I was singing a very loud mash up of Sinead O'Connor's Nothing Compares to You and Ryan Adam's Oh My Sweet Carolina (we lived in South Carolina at the time) devoted to Ollie. I never heard the end of it.

  4. August 26, 2015 / 11:53 am

    I may or may not plan weekend events around what Sprout (instagram.com/hellosprout) would like to do. And yes, my dog has his own Instagram account.

  5. August 26, 2015 / 1:19 pm

    It's all so true! Not a day goes by that I don't make up a new song about Millie. I pull out my talking pet app when I've come up with a really good one, and Millie sings them for us! Every time we leave the house, we turn to each other at least once an hour and say "what do you think she's doing now? do you think she's okay?" And every good dog mom knows there has got to be a goodbye routine. We leave our bathroom fan on so there's white noise, and if we might not be back until after dark, then a light has to be left on too. Finally, we slowly walk out of the bedroom repeating "night night Millie, we love you, you're the best," over and over. Meanwhile, she just stares at us out of the corner of her eye like she can't wait until we're gone.

  6. August 26, 2015 / 1:46 pm

    I'm glad I'm not the only one! I definitely have the elaborate "goodbye…I love you so much" routine going on and my husband I constantly make up songs as well. They've each got "voices" too. Proud to be a crazy dog lady!

  7. August 26, 2015 / 2:03 pm

    I used to make fun of these people until I became one and now I totally get it. Whenever I leave the house I have to make sure he is looking at me, in the eyes, while I tell him I love him so much and I will be back soon. And yesterday when I left, I gave him this little chewy thing that he's supposed to chew on and eventually eat, and while I was out somehow my mind started wandering going "what if he chokes on it" and I was super paranoid about it all day. Our dog sleeps with us (anyone else lol??) and yesterday we talked about starting to have him sleep on the floor, and we just couldn't do it. Even though we get no sleep with him in the bed, the thought of him all the way on the floor was just too far away. Also, I'm buying a t-shirt right now, because I'm having a bad day and shopping's how I cope. Hopefully the guy who asked me "are you a teacher? you're home a lot" will see me wearing it and get that I am just a SAHDM.

    x. Morgan

  8. August 26, 2015 / 3:12 pm

    Yes to all of this, times 3. For as obsessive I am about my dogs every day, I have not shared a single picture of them today! I also am TOTALLY wearing your dog shirt today. Not yours but one I bought from your etsy! –Dorrie @ Rt 1 US 1

  9. August 26, 2015 / 3:47 pm

    My siblings and I have created a variety of songs about our family dog, Maebe. Most of them are originals, but "Maebe" also basically fits in every song perfectly if you replace the word "baby". So it's pretty straightforward.

    Oh, and we also have 1000 nicknames for her. Bob is one of them. Twee Twee is another. But Mae Birds is what we call her 80% of the time.

    And I may be smited for typing this but we also wrap her in a blanket and hold her in our arms like a newborn and call her the Maebe Jesus.

    … so tempted to buy that t-shirt. I have thought about it a few times…

  10. August 26, 2015 / 4:17 pm

    Omgosh Harlow in the camp chair! Beyond cute. I m the exact same with our dog, Bear. If we're all hanging out and he gets up to lay somewhere else then I seriously think I've done something to insult him and will feel guilty all night.

  11. August 26, 2015 / 4:44 pm

    Awwww!

    My roommate has dogs and I feel like they're partly mine. Man, I love those two. They're crazy and adorable and so sweet and fun and I just love them.

  12. August 26, 2015 / 4:52 pm

    i get really nervous that my dogs will get out of the yard all teh time. like sometimes in a sick way i make an excuse to go home. something is wrong with me. i hope that photo from camping of harlow in a chair is framed. I think michael might need a shirt too…

  13. August 26, 2015 / 6:07 pm

    I have to say goodbye to my puppy a thousand times before I leave too! I hate that he doesn't know why I have to leave. I just love how dogs just know when something is wrong and they know exactly what to do to comfort you. Happy Dog Day to Harlow!

  14. August 26, 2015 / 8:36 pm

    You are not a crazy dog lady. It's all completely normal. I always think if someone breaks into the house they're going to kidnap my Rocco.

  15. August 26, 2015 / 9:19 pm

    Hahaha I love this! I've only been a dog owner for a few months but I can totally relate!

  16. August 26, 2015 / 11:23 pm

    The reality is…I think you and I are normal. People that don't act this way puzzle me.

  17. August 27, 2015 / 1:04 am

    Currently naming my honeymoon based on places I can bring my dogs. There's nothing wrong with us, girl.

    • August 27, 2015 / 1:07 am

      *planning

  18. August 27, 2015 / 1:33 am

    Love this post! I'm one of those crazy pet owners who loves dogs AND cats. I sing to them. I talk to them. I imagine what they answer to me. I have 5 fur babies, and they have different personalities, so OF COURSE they answer differently based on who is talking back to me.

  19. August 27, 2015 / 4:57 pm

    I love this post! I'm a little crazy too. I definitely make up songs for my dog and tell him goodbye a million times. My boyfriend is always sleeping when I leave in the morning and sometimes when I tell Colby Jack that I love him my boyfriend says he loves me too and I'm always like. Not talking to you!!

  20. August 27, 2015 / 5:24 pm

    I don't have a pupper but I do have three cats that I talk to all the time & dance with & wonder about – especially our youngest, Tyrion. He's naughty! Ha, ha! But I totally get it, I would rather snuggle in bed with my baby girl, Chandler, than go out. 🙂

  21. December 24, 2015 / 5:22 am
  22. December 30, 2015 / 8:48 am
  23. July 19, 2016 / 11:38 pm

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