On Working In Troll Town

I almost left a rude snarky comment on someone’s blog post today.

Not because I wanted to “educate them,” no, several commenters before me already had done that, or because I really felt my opinion needed to be heard (well kind of this,) but at the core of it I just wanted to be a little jerk. I wanted to say something cutting and maybe just slightly belittling simply because I didn’t like this person’s opinion.

According to me, they weren’t RIGHT.

And it made me mad! Boo.

Midway through typing my very witty comment I caught myself and thought, what the hell are you doing? I don’t like it when people leave shitty comments on my post, so why would I do it to someone else?

I quickly deleted it and then had a little talk with myself.

It’s been a funky week, I think we can all admit that. I’ve been falling for Facebook traps I don’t usually fall for. I’ll come across posts that I know will piss me off and yet I dive in anyway. Everyday we have the option to scroll-on or troll-on and I’ve been choosing the latter lately. And that’s not like me.

I found myself wanting to post things that were condescending and hurtful rather than helpful.

My inner dialogue while browsing online has been something like this for the past three days-

*sees post I know will make me mad*

licks lips and clicks on it, oooh 54 comments this will be good!

I knew I wouldn’t like this and I was right! I’m mad!

*keeps reading, gets angrier*

This does not please me!

*reads more*

My thoughts must be heard too! I won’t be happy until I convince everyone to believe exactly what I believe is right!

*finds comments backing up my opinion*

I don’t know this person but I’d like to be best friends now.

*finds comment from a friend going against my opinion*

our friendship is over forever. you’re a monster.

*stews about it, makes up fictional fights in head, stews more, writes a response, deletes, stews, writes, more fictional debates, deletes, reads more comments, feels mad, then sad, stews, feels defeated,

and then all energy is gone.*

ext ext.

That’s embarrassing to admit. Oof.

I started with good intentions, but then somewhere in the past few days my ego took over and went to town.


pound on keyboard. spit on screen. blah blah blah.

But what I learned from working as a troll this past week is that the more nasty comments I devoured, the hungrier I got. It never seemed to stop. I was never satisfied.

Before someone jumps in I should clarify I am all for advocating for what you believe in, and for speaking up for yourself, I don’t think being complacent is ever a good thing. Today, I’m simply putting myself in check for a moment because I stopped fighting for what I believe in and gave into simply fighting. And who is that serving? Nobody.

I’ve never seen numbers on this before, but I have a feeling no one has ever really changed their beliefs or ideas thanks to a very inspiring Facebook fight they were involved in.

I don’t have an end for this post because I’m feeling oddly insecure about it and am already worried people will read it and find something to tear apart. That’s not usually a concern of mine so perhaps that goes with the territory of being an angry troll?

That being said, I don’t really enjoy the position of mayor of Troll Town so I’m resigning today.

Hopefully tomorrow I’ll start fresh as a human just trying to be better.