Well it would appear the odds were not in my favor regarding that audition I had a few days ago. As much as I hit refresh over and over yesterday, the "we want YOU!" email never came. And the really sad part is I even checked my spam for it. And I never check my spam. I couldn't have felt more like Jim Carrey from Cable Guy, "Hey Steve, it's me again, wasn't sure if you called while I was out... thought your voicemail might be broken, or mine, so I was just double checking... Anyway, call me back...."
But alas, no email. Not even in my spam. In all honesty I'm getting better at this whole game of rejection in this dirty world of acting I've entered as of late, but better doesn't mean I'm completely used to it- yet. At the end of the day it still just sucks. It doesn't help the fact that I'm a dweller. I will go over every situation that didn't go my way at least twenty times in my head trying to figure out what I did wrong. Where did I screw up? Was it my outfit? Did I start fake tap dancing? Did I accidentally do my Target lady voice? Target lady has been my nervous voice lately... I know, I know it's completely unoriginal. I'm working on breaking it, don't worry.
But then I saw this on Instagram last night and it was just was I needed. So thanks Barbara Sims for posting. I needed it for more than a few things in life right now.
The thing is, Chicago is so full of talented people it's mind boggling. There's just a lot of funny ass people who live in this wonderful little city of wind, and as soon as I think I might start to have it figured out just a little bit, fifty other people come in and knock me right back down in my place. It's quite humbling, I must say. So I'm just doing what I can for the moment, and that's only trying to focus on things that are within my control. Like I always say, que sera sera.
But on the bright side, there's always another thing just around the corner. Like the fact Harlow and I might be extras in a short video tomorrow. That's right, I said Harlow and myself. I've always had a feeling he's going to make it big before me, anyway. And I'm okay with that, it's all for the greater good.