The Last Fall Photo You'll Ever See- Really.

Friday, November 22, 2013

Let this be known as the last fall photo that shall grace this blog for the season.


Because after I took it just a few days ago, the cold moved in and stripped almost all of the beautiful trees of their colorful clothes. And now it's just grey. Hello, winter. Should I just go ahead and assume you'll be here for the next six months or so?


But enough weather talk, I'm sure you'll be doing plenty of that later today in awkward client conversations or during the down moments when you're stuck on an elevator with someone you kinda know, but don't really know. So let's get into another edition of Really!?!


(featuring me, not Seth and Amy.)


It was announced this week that serial killer, Charles Manson, will be marrying his "25-year-old crush, Star." Really Charlie? A 25-year-old, really!?! Star began writing Manson after she read about him online, presumably on Tinder. Manson was quoted saying, “She's not a woman. She's a star in the Milky Way!” when referring to Star, (in case you didn't catch that subtle reference.) I don't know about you, but I can't wait to follow Star's wedding inspiration board on Pinterest! And if anyone is wondering, they are registered at Bed, Bath, and Beyond, Pottery Barn, and Hell. Really though.


In Cuyahoga Falls, Ohio, Black Friday shoppers have already began setting up tents outside of a Best Buy. Really people? Why? Why would you really do this? What on earth are you planning to buy that you would give up seven days of your life to sit and wait for? Does Best Buy sell a cure to cancer now? Or a time machine? Because I can't possibly think of anything else worthy of camping out in parking lot. Furthermore, it's behavior like this that encourages greedy retailers to open on the evening of Thanksgiving, taking their employees from deserved time off with their families. And that really pisses me off.


It was announced this week that "Selfie" is the word of the year according to Oxford Dictionary. Really, Oxford Dictionary? "Selfie" is the word you choose, really!?! Considering the word of the year in 2006 was "carbon-neutral," I think it's pretty obvious that our society is definitely moving in the right direction. Obvi. Totes. #hashies.

It was also announced this week that the head of the choosing committee for Oxford Dictionary's word of the year is this kid.
Sadly he couldn't be reached for an interview because he was too busy biting his lip.

Other nominations for words of the year that didn't quite make the cut were:

Kimassigan- as in "I just saw Kim Kardashian's bare ass again."
Instdapress- the depressed feeling you get when no one like your Instagram photo.
Instawhathefug- the "wtf" feeling you get when 4,319 people like the photo on Instagram of a teenage boy biting his lip.
Mugsen- as in "Miley's talking about drugs again."
Juscamatute- as in "Justin Bieber just got caught on camera with a prostitute."

*this list might have to continue on in its own post, what do you think?

And I guess I should probably mention Kanye's new music video "Bound 2." Where do I start with this one? Really though, I have no idea where to even begin. At first glance you might just think this is any other couple at Six Flags posing in front of a blue screen, anxious to take home a souvenir photo. And that's actually pretty spot on.


Kim then goes on to get naked and vibrate on the seat of Kanye's motorcycle while lying on her back, free of shame for all the world to see her just bouncing up and down, completely naked. So like I said, not that different from the average couple at Six Flags.

As for the song, well I'm still confused if the video I was watching was skipping, or if it's just three parts of music that are absolutely nothing alike.
Part 1- we intro with a bit that sounds like a song taken from a scene in Coming to America, or maybe it's from the prom scene in Love and Basketball, you decide.
Part 2- we hear a little girl, possibly North West Compass Map I'm assuming, say "uh huh honey."
Part 3- Yeezus starts spitting mad raps and the world is changed forever.

It might be his best work yet, really.

And I've got to conclude with this photo. Really, mom and dad?!? You think it's polite to send me photos like this all week while I'm stuck in cold Chicago? It's rude is what it is.


Luckily, I will be joining my parents in this lovely little villa in Cabo in less than twenty-four hours. And yes, in case you're wondering I will be blogging from abroad. You can judge me for taking my computer on vacay but I'm not ashamed to admit I actually like blogging while in Mexico. There's nothing better than sitting on the patio with a drink in hand, watching the sunset over the ocean while I recap the day with a little bit of writing. It's my happy place. So while my post-times might be a little off and I won't be around every day, I will be posting periodically.

And of course I'll be all over Instagram @taylorgracewolfe. Have a wonderful weekend, mis compadres. Adios!


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33 comments:

  1. hahha oh man so much goodness in one post. the campers? that's disturbing. its not even the week of yet. Star is somehow pretty. weird. SELFIE? no. the kanye video is so bad it's good. maybe

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  2. HAHAHA Love this post! I seriously can't believe the people already camped out. It's just sick! Have so much fun in Cabo!!!!

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  3. Have an amazing time in Cabo :)

    And don't even get me started on the idiots who actually camp out for those Black Friday deals which they may as well start calling Black Turkey since it's interrupting everyone's Thanksgiving dinner now. So sad...

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  4. This is so funny! Your words of the year are a hoot. I vote yes to a whole post. I am off to take 45 selfies in hope of receiving 12 likes on instagram.

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  5. YES TO ALL OF THIS. You're damn hilarious and have fun in Cabo!

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  6. "and Hell" - best line of the post

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  7. The Kimyeezus video is SO DISTURBING I just really can't get over it. Or the fact that you'll be in Cabo and I'll be here, cold and jealous. Have fun!

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  8. You'll be blogging from Mexico in your happy place, rubbing it in all of our faces hahah. DO IT! :) Hope you have a wonderful time!
    Loved this post--your humor is right in line with mine :)

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  9. I have only participated in one black Friday and I will never do it again. So the people who camp out are out of their ever-loving mind, imho. Just like Star. Great post! Have a fabulous time Cabo!

    Jess @ The Odell Yodel

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  10. I'm pretty speechless about this post really.. I can't come up with anything intelligent to say so I am just going to sit here with my eyebrows raised at the crazy things people come up with/do. Ha ha!

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  11. Even weirder is Manson claims to be bisexual and the creepy older guy look alike they were taking photos with at the jail. Over 4000 likes for biting your lip?! Really?! The word of the day needs to continue on!!! People who camp out for deals are just crazy pants. Have fun in Cabo girl!!

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  12. Of all of these completely ridiculous things I'm most annoyed by "selfie" being considered as an actual word. It also completely baffles me that over four thousand people liked that kids stupid photo. Instagram makes so little sense to me.

    Have the best time in Cabo!

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  13. i can't believe i just wasted four minutes i've my life watching a videa that kim and kanye made in their basement.

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  14. I just can't help but think Kazeeyus actually made that video back in 1993 and the raw footage couldn't be edited any better than that. Also, I'll be seeing Charles Manson in my nightmares thank you very much! have fun on vaca!

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  15. You should probs do a link up for "What Items Would Merit Camping Outside of a Store for Multiple Days"

    LittleBirdBlogs

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  16. Um REALLY about the leaves falling!? Your fall pictures make me so happy though...:( And REALLY about you going to Cabo?! So jealous. Have a margarita (or five) for all of us!!!

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  17. This might have been one of my favorite posts you wrote- our world is so screwed up sometimes I can't even handle it!

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  18. This post was great! Also, Star was born and raised in St. Louis—go figure.

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  19. Black friday day shoppers... really?! They could work the entire week instead of camping out and then buy what they are waiting to buy at full price. Win, Win I would think.

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  20. The weather is robbing mid Texas too. I can see a lake from my back yard and all morning it has been steaming because yesterday it was 70 and today its 31!

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  21. I just...Ohio. Pull your shit together. Black Friday is a week away. Yet another reason you suck.

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  22. There are so many disturbing things about Kayne's video, one being how baggy his pants are. Really?!? It's like he's going all Kriss Kross and time warping. Only I'd rather listen to Jump than the crap that Kayne is pretending sounds good these days. Enjoy Cabo!

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  23. I don't think it is possible to be more pretentious than that video. Seriously. What a pile of s***. Not to mention the song is absolutely horrible. And this is from someone that likes quite a few of his songs. Very disappointing.

    So jealous of your trip! Have fun : )

    bisous
    Suzanne

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  24. Wait. How does that kid haver over 4,000 likes on instagram?! This doesn't seem right.

    xo

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  25. Seriously... the black friday shoppers... ridiculous!

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  26. Definitely jealous of your Cabo trip. Have fun, girl! I'm so sad that the trees are all becoming naked, one by one. :(

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  27. Lovee the really posts, cabo looks amazing! Jealous!

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  28. Ugh - don't even get me started on Kimye. Bleeeeehhhhh.

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  29. YES!!! Someone was trying to argue and tell me that Bound 2 was Kanye's version of a joke and we aren't supposed to take it seriously. Kanye takes himself more seriously than any human being. It's just disgusting. Have fun on vacation.

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  30. See I'd go like all crazy retail on those people's asses who have been waiting a week for a tv or whatever they're waiting for because I'm sacrificing all of my Thanksigiving because of Black "Friday" to work, but then I'd be forced to marry Charles Manson, and to be honest the guy gives me the willies.

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