The Mooning Incident- Day 29

Wednesday, October 29, 2014

Let's go way back here and talk about the first time I really recall being embarrassed. This is an old old memory, might be one of my oldest in fact. But because I was so ashamed, it's one I haven't let go of quite yet.

It's 1990, I'm just three years old, most of my days are spent at my mom's Jazzercise studio downtown. No one's really surprised my mom owned a Jazzercise studio, right? I didn't think so. My brother and sister are in school (thank God) so I get to spend every day to myself in the studio while my mom teaches the afternoon classes. Unlike most children, I loved being alone. The other kids just didn't play "right" so I enjoyed a good playroom all to myself. Sidenote, I can truly remember going over to friends' houses when I was little and I'd sometimes actually ask them to go play in the other room so I could play with their toys by myself. If you're not going to play Barbies correctly and according to the wonderful script I have planned out, then just don't play at all. Am I right or am I right?

Anyway, I spent my days at Jazzercise day dreaming, coloring shitty pictures of cats, and eating pounds and pounds of greasy tator-tots from Tastee Treat.

One particular day I happened to notice a lot of people walking by the front window and a new fun idea suddenly popped into my tiny bizarre brain. Why not give these people a show?

So for reasons I still can't explain, I decided to pull down my pants and sit in the front window with my bare ass cheeks pressed against the glass.

I was so nonchalant about it that from where my mom was instructing on her stage, it appeared I was just chilling in the front window like I usually did. And so I sat there like that for a good twenty minutes just mooning everyone who happened to be strolling downtown Norfolk. It was all fun and games until my mom's class was over and someone who had left already came back inside and narked on me.

"Um your daughter's ass is hanging out in the front window." Maybe the lady who told on me said that, maybe she didn't. I'll never know.

Regardless my mom immediately yanked me from my own peep show and scolded me in front of all of the other women who hadn't left yet. It was humiliating and shameful and no one seemed to appreciate the humor in it like I had hoped they would.

I wouldn't be this embarrassed again for a long time. Not until my dad would find me reading his Dennis Rodman book "Bad As I Want To Be" alone in my room a few years later.

*Just to give you some reference here's a photo of me from around this time, so I'm clearly going through some stuff...


*Tomorrow's prompt: Facts About You!
The Daily Tay Blogtober14

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12 comments:

  1. Greatest post ever!!! Hilarious!!! What would life be without those moments? I, also have had many, many embarrassing moments and I really believe that is why my sense of humor is so good today....better than crying about things, right? Me-6 yrs old- at the bay - with mom and dad + their friends - I climb a tree right above where they are having a picnic - and I pee. They think it's suddenly raining......oh the shame.....that my sister and brother will NEVER let me forget. Now grown, I am the funny one of the family. Coincidence? I don't think so......

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  2. Loved your story about mooning people! My most embarrassing moment follows a similar line of thought...9th grade orientation lock-in with 100 new girls at my Catholic high school...a friend I had know for a few years thought it would be funny to pants me in front of everyone, and when I chased after her to return the favor, I slipped on some water and went careening across the slick gym floor and crashed directly into the bleachers. Subtle, right? I still cringe as I replay the scene in my head. Will there by a November blog prompt per day or do you knew where we could find a similar challenge?

    Love the blog!

    Molly @ generalsandgingers.blogspot.com

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  3. This is hilarious haha! And in regards to the barbies.. you are 100% right. My three year old self and your three year old self may have been able to leave our separate rooms and actually play together because I also believed in a social etiquette that inevitably came with playing barbies or anything else for that matter.

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  4. Um, this is HILARIOUS!!! Thanks for the good laugh:)

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  5. This story is classic! I love how you were fine with showing everyone your butt, and then got embarrassed when your mom got on to you for it!

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  6. hahaa this is the best. I too, loved being alone to play by myself. I feel like we would have been great friends growing up.

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  7. You were so brave to moon everybody after eating all of those tater tots! To be young again. I'm Bonnie's sister by the way. beckyblackburn.com

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  8. I admire Child Tay's style of going about life.

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  9. Hilarious!

    You have always been into making people laugh, haven't you??

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  10. Lol! I'd bet you made a few people laugh before you were ratted out. I love the random things kids decide to do. They're so unpredictable!

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